My heart belongs to Groucho, Re: Loud, but lame, New York Post, November 18, 2011

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies.

Groucho Marx.

Occupy Wall Streeters look for trouble, find it everywhere, diagnose it incorrectly and want to apply the wrong remedies.

Me.

That covers it. Between Groucho and me we’ve defined Occupy Wall Streeters in a nutshell and given everyone else cause to reject, ignore and laugh at them and get on with life, as if there wasn’t enough cause already.

Reject them? Absolutely. The core of their argument is that capitalism is evil and responsible for whatever economic inequities exist in the United States and other Western countries and that socialism can redress these inequities and ensure prosperity for all. That’s their argument whether they know it or not, which most of them don’t by the way thanks to our wretched educational systems.

Capitalism is evil? Not according to the billions upon billions of people who have thrived under it it isn’t. Socialism and big government as a panacea for economic inequity? Totally ridiculous. History has already rejected that many times over and it should be rejected now too.

Ignore them? Of course. Why on earth would anyone take them seriously? Occupy Wall Streeter’s arguments and methods are juvenile and what Occupy Wall Streeters really are are spoiled children with a misguided sense of entitlement, few if any marketable skills and a non-existent work ethic who nonetheless think that they are morally and ethically superior to everyone else and that the world would be a better place if it would only operate according to their wishes. Occupy Wall Street protests and demonstrations are nothing more than giant temper tantrums by spoiled children who think in terms of platitudes, cliches and aphorisms.

If Occupy Wall Streeters can’t be ignored because they are being destructive, disruptive, demeaning and dirty they should be dealt with accordingly, sent off for a quiet time if possible or spanked (metaphorically of course) if it isn’t.

Or maybe told they can’t get up from the table until they eat their vegetables.

Laugh at them. Absolutely. Occupy Wall Streeters are pretentious, simple-minded fools and pretentious, simple-minded fools are always laughable. The Marx Brothers knew this better than anybody and created some of the greatest comedy classics ever made as a result.

Hooray for Captain Spaulding…

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